Day 34, evening

Please forgive my failure to provide an update for the past week. For most of that time very little progress toward Kathy’s wakefulness was forthcoming, despite my over-zealous over-readings of the slightest indication of responsiveness from her, and my constant whisperings of love and encouragement. No signs of advancement during this phase of Kathy’s tenure at Cottage was discouraging. Indications from Kathy’s team of caregivers produced no hint of improvement toward wakefulness and purposeful response to stimulus, and the message to me was that it might be time to summon family. Abby and Paige and Prescott, and Anna and family, all of whom you’ve met through earlier posts to this blog, have arrived, as well as Kathy’s sister Laurie and her husband Roland, fellow travelers and partiers with Kathy and me.

Yesterday morning, with Abby and Paige and me at Kathy’s bedside, Kathy opened her eyes (in itself not a true sign of progress), tracked me when I moved from her vision’s front to its side (a very real and significant sign of progress), yawned a world class yawn, then smiled when I asked her to smile, and then smiled again when I asked her to smile again (tremendously brain-intensive efforts that lifted my spirits to the heavens). Then, after producing such a prodigious effort, and I would go so far as to say miraculous effort, she lapsed again into sleep, encouragingly just like her old self. Most of the staff seemed dubious that she had actually performed any of those awe-inspiring feats.

Today we had a planned family meeting with Dr. Zauner, expecting a recommendation that had been signaled to us over the past week, that we prepare for a difficult decision. Hence the summoning of family.

Prior to our meeting Dr. Zauner performed an examination of Kathy’s condition. Then, at the meeting, introduced by a chaplain by the name of Clay, Dr. Zauner expressed to the gathered family that his examination indicated agreement with our observation that Kathy had indeed opened her eyes, and had indeed tracked me – that is, looked purposefully “at” me. He then described the complex mental gymnastics that go into such an act, not at all an act capable of being performed by a comatose person. Did he think, therefore, that there was valid reason to continue treatment in hopes of a recovery? When asked what he would do were it his loved one, he told us that, with Kathy’s condition, her age, her health history, and discounting religious beliefs and family disagreements (there are none here), and most tellingly considering her progress over the previous 30 hours, he would give it a bit more time to monitor and see what happens. What does he mean by a “bit” I asked. “Maybe a week,” he said.

Veterans of Cottage Hospital SICU recognize good news when we hear it.

Tonight, a celebration! Come on, Kathy!

 

45 Comments on

  2. Beautiful, wonderful Kathy…Come on! We all can’t wait to see that genuine, contagious smile of yours! You have always reminded me that “slow and steady wins the race!” You got this! Xoxo. Much much love to all of you!

  3. Come on Kathy!!!! You are so loved!!!!
    Richard thank you for the update, I can’t tell you how much peace your words give us.
    Come on Kathy!!!!!!!!!!!!! Xoxo

    • Yippie skippie! She’s on her way back!! It was just a very long trip! This time we can actually hope they lost any baggage she might have been draggin around, eh?! Xo big hug to Richard please…

  5. So happy to hear this wonderful news…smiling….twice…awesome…I am so happy for the update..thank you…Come on Kathy…come on back to your wonderful loving family and friends. Prayers continuing here….Patti

  6. amazing! Come on Kathy! You are a warrior princess! Keep it up!

  7. Thinking of you every day Kathy, hoping for the best… wake up, wake up…

  8. So many people are routing for you Kathy. We know you can do this.. Best of thoughts for you and your recovery.

  9. Oh, Richard, this is such wonderful news. How your heart must have soared with her smile. And I know that all our hearts are doing the same with that news. Continuous love, thoughts, prayers, and “come on Kathys” to you all. ~ sherri

  10. Robert and family,
    I had the privilege of having Kathy as my RN internship mentor and preceptor over the past year. I have been wanting to post words of encouragement and/or thanks for keeping all of us who know and love Kathy informed of her progress for some time now, but words usually fail me when I try to begin. I have been whispering my own little cheers for her recovery and for your continued strength during this very challenging time. Come on, Kathy!

  11. Wow. That is so wonderful that she smiled! That is so encouraging! I hope that things get easier for all of you and that this is the beginning of many milestones in the future. Thank you for the update Richard and Come On Kathy!!!

  12. Yea baby!!!!!!! Yeehaw! Cheers 2u all from across the pond!!!! I’ll say a prayer & send a kiss to Kate on the wind!!! Xo Netta

  14. Thanks for your continuing updates and great devotion. I’m glad you are all gathered together to welcome Kathy back.

  15. Thanks for the update Richard,pulling and praying harder than ever .Love you guys.Come on Kathy!!!!!!

  16. Thanks, Richard, for the update! We continue our prayers – come on Kathy!! So many who love her are with all of you in spirit as you keep vigil by her bedside. It is evident that she feels your love and your presence. Come on Kathy!!

  18. Richard and family – I only have tears and more prayers. May it continue.

  19. Come on Kathy! We are all waiting for you. Thank you Richard and family for sharing your journey with us . It is a true inspiration of unconditional love. Suzi

  20. wonderful news, and if anything is going to further encourage her to not be a “sleepy head,” it will have been the sight of you, Richard, when she opened her eyes. So of course she couldn’t resist a smile. Come on Kathy!!

    • Come on Kathy!!! Its time to wake up! Love the thought of that smile! Love you Kathy! Love to you Richard, Paige, Abby! diane

  21. Thanks Richard. Continued thoughts, prayers and strong vibes from four time-zones to your east. When your clock catches up to ours, may you experience this beautiful, blessed afternoon we’re having.

  23. Wow, that was a scary one to read.
    good for Kathy.
    Imagine what it must be like to wake up after weeks of sleeping/being out.
    C’mon Kathy

  24. Keep up the good work Kathy!! Stay strong Richard Paige Abby Prescot Laurie Anna and all the other family members whose names evade me!! I am praying for more smiles!!! don’t forget the KISSES!!!! They always make me smile!!! LOve Love Love.. stacy

  25. C’mon Kathy! So many people cheering you on and wishing and praying for the best for you! The love your husband and family show for you is so strong, and I know you can feel it, even during your slumber. Time to wake now, Sleeping Beauty! Time to return to the strong, intelligent, loving woman everyone here knows you to be. I don’t know if you remember me (having not worked together for nearly 6 years now), but I certainly remember you! I remember you as a lovely person who is also a force to be reckoned with, and I cannot image you being anything but strong and resilient in the face of your current situation. So, c’mon Kathy! Show em who’s boss!

  26. Sending positive thoughts & prayers to Kathy and all of you during these uncertain times. We hope we again have an opportunity to see/spend time with Kathy soon. love from Michele & Larry

  27. So, so happy to hear of Kathy’s progress! Doctor’s caution, notwithstanding, this is fantastic news. Come on, Kathy!

  28. Come on Kathy!!! That was not a pleasant dream, you actually saw and smiled at Richard! Come on Kathy!

  30. Come on Kathy! We all love you and are out here waiting for you and pulling for you! That was Richard you saw and smiled at this morning. Come back to him now. No more sleeping! Get up! Wake up! Come up out of the depths to the ones who love you so! <3
    joanne

  31. Oh please dear God, wake our Kathy up, bring her back to her loving, happy self. So glad Laurie and Roland are there with you Richard, Abby and Paige. C’mon Kathy!

  32. What can I add to all these cheerleaders for Kathy, just ditto ditto ditto.
    It has been an awfully long, silent, hard and impatient 5 days without news. I think we have all been worried to open the next message. I am SOOO glad you had that smile (well, actually 2) when you needed it most.
    All my love to you all at Kath’s bedside. My heart is full of hope.
    ~~Uma

  33. When I think of Kathy I think of an encouraging mentor. Still taking my pre req classes for the nursing program has been a long haul to say the least. With 3 kids and full time work this seems never ending at times and in my moments of questioning ” is this really for me?” I can always count on Kathy. Giving me all of her advise on trying to manage school, home & work in my 40’s she is always reminding me and encouraging me that if she did it I can too! “Keep following your plan & don’t give up!”
    Well know the time is yours to follow that advise. It’s just another obstacle in the plan & so I say to you Kathy “Don’t give up, we all know it’s not in your character and Come On Kathy!”

  34. Just checking in on you all. Its late and Im sure that you are beyond exhausted, yet still unable to sleep well…. I am praying for you all tonight. That you see continued glimmers of hope until there is the final ignition to awake and alert. Big huge hugs.
    Lauranne

  35. Brains&minds&bodies the wonders of our age so many gifts you&kathys endowments your riches welling from souls ever wondering of lifes wonders and that heart of rhythm percussion of life and soul not wondering why pulsing thru time & eternity just now home home home gypsies passing thru earths terrors&wonders uncontrollable feelings learning to dance no billiard balls here we are thank the gods for both of you together&apart the chimes make music and we know which way the wind blows and I feel her on my skin in the sun lite of earthly wonder she drys rivers of tears, memories in the face of love beyond breath for faith is the SUBSTANCE of things hoped for amen

  36. Hang in there, all of you. As usual, positive vibes going your way from the east coast!

  37. Come on Kathy! Positive thinking and prayers going out to you and your family!

  39. Come on Katy! Keep giving us that “The Look of Love” because we’re looking at you beyond cities, states, space and time to put our arms around you in spirit and bring you back to your loved ones! Come on Kathy, give us that smile again. You are loved!

    Peace & Blessing to you Richard and your precious family! Keep singing this song in your heart!

    xoxoxo
    Francesca in New York

    “The Look Of Love”

    The look of love is in your eyes
    A look your smile can’t disguise
    The look of love is saying so much more than just words could ever say
    And what my heart has heard, well it takes my breath away

    I can hardly wait to hold you, feel my arms around you
    How long I have waited
    Waited just to love you, now that I have found you

    You’ve got the
    Look of love, it’s on your face
    A look that time can’t erase

  40. Wow! Reading your post Richard was hard, thinking the MD was giving you a time limit. Thank you for not giving up hope.
    The posts from all your friends and family only echo all I feel. Kathy has a serenity that is wonderful to be in the presence of.
    The cheerleading sounds like a labor room…come on and push!
    Come on Kathy you are 10 cm and need to push! We are waiting for you to be reborn whole and healthy after your long sleep.
    Come on Kathy Come on!

    • Laurie, I loved your “cheerleading” comment. I just kept hearing “Come On!”
      So I just sort of started chanting it as I was thinking about Kathy with tears flowing from my eyes.
      I decided I would do a mystical technique at night before sleeping visualizing Kathy walking and talking and me saying “Come On!”

      And then The Beatles song come creeping into my brain –“Please, Please me” with that chorus of “C’mon!” So I started humming and singing and my tears turned to joyful hope! So let’s cheer Kathy on with a song! I’m sure she remembers this song and the thrilling joy we all felt when The Beatles sang it!

      I’ve rewritten The Beatles words a bit to become Kathy’s Song.
      (Sing to the tune of The Beatles “Please Please Me”)

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QOZ17BWje1Y

      Tonight let’s say these words to our Girl
      You know we must try this for our Girl
      C’mon (C’mon), c’mon (C’mon), c’mon (C’mon), c’mon (C’mon)
      Please Kathy please, please, we’re waiting for you!

      Your family’s there to show the way, love
      Listen to what they have to say “love”
      C’mon (C’mon), c’mon (C’mon), c’mon (C’mon), c’mon (C’mon)
      Please Kathy please, please, we’re waiting for you!

      I don’t wanna stop this singing
      Cause you know there’s always hope in our heart (In our heart)
      We’ll do all the pleasing Kathy, it’s so hard to be
      Without you, whoah yeah, won’t you come back to us soon.

      Tonight let’s say these words to our Girl
      You know we must try this for our Girl
      C’mon (C’mon), c’mon (C’mon), c’mon (C’mon), c’mon (C’mon)
      Please Kathy please, please, we’re waiting for you!

      God bless you all and keep a song in your heart today for Kathy and for the world!
      The World needs joyful cheerleaders too! : < )

      • Love, love the song.
        We will be singing our hearts out. .
        C’mon, C’mon Kathy
        David & Lisa

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